I’m just a multi-passionate Christian mom of three, who sews, crochets, crafts, and creates printable and educational materials. I love working in photography, digital art, graphics, and all things crafting. The LORD is my guide as I blog about my life.
I’ll be the first to admit that:
I am not perfect.
That sentence should stand alone. I will never be perfect because perfection is not a possibility to a human being. Perfection is of God. Does that mean I don’t try my best, I sure do, everyday but I fall short. I fail. I fall down. I give in to temptation often, especially the kind that comes covered in chocolate. I do things I know I should not do, such as avoid laundry like the plague. I am just a woman.
Tonight, I was tired. I knew I was tired but I thought I could keep going like that little pink bunny that used to run all over the tv. I had plans that didn’t involve falling asleep at 7. The kids didn’t have a bath yet, Bub was still working on spelling word practice, Carebear was reading a book or pretending to read of which I’m not sure and Lou began was rubbing her eyes. I thought I could get the baby down early and then get up and spend some time with the older kids, I was wrong. I woke up and it was middle of the night. The older kids had put themselves to sleep, although I have no idea when. Bub was still in his clothes and every tv in the house was on. No bath, no hugs, no good night stories, no kisses, no pajamas… No mother. I feel like a horrible mother.
These two older children are a wonder at planing, driving, and facilitating a lot of Mommy-hood Guilt Trips around here. They use whatever mean necessary to achieve the desired destination, mommy being their maid, slave, or playmate. The usual phrase is, “But your ALWAYS on your phone or on the computer.” To which I say, yes unfortunately I spend too much time online and that is true, I try to limit my time to nights and mornings but occasionally somethings need to be done and running a blog is time consuming and hard work. So it usually works as a good hot poker soaked with a thick layer of guilt juice. This is the one thing they say that really gets to me. I know I spend to much time online, I know I should spend more time offline yet I am not neglecting them as they would have you think I promise.
The other phrase I hear often is, “But you won’t (insert unusual and ridiculous request here such as playing xbox at 2 in the morning) for your only son? Your only son!” Yes son you are my only son and I love you but I’m not going to go with you to college to make sure you have on pants so it might be a good idea to start learning to pick out your own clothing choices now. And as far as that goes, does that mean I love my daughters any less because I have two?
Although this early morning as I sit here in the darkness after they have had to put themselves to sleep, I feel I have most assuredly arrived at my destination in the town of guilt. I want to be one of those mothers from tv shows like Leave it the Beaver or The Brady Bunch. Although, thinking back I can’t think of one show that the mother actually played with her children. At least their houses were clean. I often fail at that as well which is apparent by the stack of (insert any household chore here) awaiting my attention.
We are each given only so much time and with it the decision on how to use that time. There is never enough time to do everything you want or need to do, so prioritizing is key. I fail to understand the concept of priorities sometimes. Sometimes, I allow my children to eat desert first. Sometimes, I give into the playing at the park after school instead of the million other things we should be doing. Sometimes, I say cleaning can wait because I would rather sit and watch Spongebob reruns with the kids. And sometimes, I choose to get on my blog and write instead of doing the hundred other tasks that are lined up ready to be done. One day I will get to them but it doesn’t look like that day is today.
So do your kids try to drive you to the land of guilt?
By the way I love that pink car.
Sorry, I seen it and was like PINK CAR and kind of felt like the dog in Up. Once I seen it my line of thinking was altered. Distraction and ignorant bliss are my friends and we talk often. 🙂
Now to go make some guilt muffins, chocolate chip with white chocolate chunks.